Tuesday, November 12, 2013

I've Moved Blogs!

I wanted to get going on the new blog before sharing. It's been up and running for a couple months. Come on over and check it out. It would be great to have some followers on the new blog since I currently have zero, except those following by email or from facebook :)

http://confessionsofarunningmom.blogspot.com/

Hope to see you soon!

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Increasing Intervals

I have no scientific rhyme or reason for running the intervals I run. I know that Jeff Galloway has a chart to figure out the best intervals to use, however I have been to comfortable, stubborn and lazy to get my book and look it up.

I probably should...

Anyways, I decide to increase my intervals when I feel like I'm getting too comfortable, or when I feel ready for a challenge/extra push.

I've run 30:1, 45:1, 1:1 and currently 115:1. I do hope to eventually get to running for a few minutes and walking one or less, but I have to work my way up to it.

As I left work today I checked my interval timer. It was still on the 30:1 intervals from the race on Saturday and I made a comment to Lorien that I would run the 30:1 intervals tonight for 30-40 minutes. But as I started driving home I thought about pushing myself and increasing my intervals. 

Instead of adding more time to the running intervals though I decided to take away time from the walking interval. I ran 1:15 and walked :45. It worked well and the first two miles were under 12 minute miles. 

The third mile I told myself to slow down. Way down. And I did. To a 13:46 minute mile. It was more of a cool down than anything because I feel like I went out to fast (like I tend to do). 

I need to stop going for speed and remember that, for now a least, I'm working on building up distance again. 

I'm definitely not a speed runner and probably never will be, but it's something to think about working on. I would like to continue improving and continue to push myself to that next level. At the same time I want to stop taking on too much at once.

For now I will continue to bump up the intervals until I get comfortable. It's been nice feeling proud of myself after a run, no matter the distance.


Monday, September 23, 2013

"That's Quite an Accomplishment!"

We finished our 5K strong. I suggested that when we got close to the finish area that we just run the rest of the way, even if the interval timer beeped at us to walk. They both agreed and I could tell that it was going to be a good, strong finish for all three of us.

It took us 44 minutes, but we did it. This is my slowest 5K, but it was also my first as a pace group leader (unless you count the races I run with my sister). A little over half way was the most difficult part which included a trail and uphill, two things we hadn't really trained for. It wasn't awful, but different.

My niece wanted to take an extra walk break just after mile 2 (something I told her we would do if needed). I suggested we just go a little slower for the next running interval. We did but then she complained about a cramp in her side. I had us put our arms above our heads and breathe deeply. I really wanted to push her enough to finish without taking extra breaks. I told her that it was her head telling her she couldn't do it and to push through.

She did and ended without taking any extra walk breaks.

I couldn't be more proud of my niece and of my friend.

So why is it impossible for me to be proud of myself as well?

After the race my mom, Isabel and I went to the nearby grocery store to pick up something to eat and a coffee from Starbucks. We had a little bit of time between the race and Emma's soccer game so we went to kill some time. I still had my bib and medal on so the lady at the Starbucks counter asked me what race I just did. I told her the Simi 5K and she said "That's quite an accomplishment."

My initial reaction was to tell her that it's really not. That my normal course is a 5K and I can do it daily. That my favorite distance is a half marathon. That the tattoo on my wrist was for a full marathon. The distance of a 5K is "only" 3.1. That there were people I ran with who completed their first 5K, that my niece placed second in her age group, that they accomplished something that day.

But I stopped myself. I simply said "thank you" because it is an accomplishment. The completion of a race- 5K, 10K, half, full, ultra- is an accomplishment. I will display my bib on my display board that I made myself with just as much pride as the rest. I will hang my medal on my display board that I made myself with just as much pride as the rest. Why? Because it was an experience that I don't want to forget.

Did anything special happen on that race to me in particular? No, not really. But I had a wonderful time. I felt pride in pushing other people to try something they may not have tried. I have a new running buddy that enjoys it just as much as I do. And whether I was participating in the race or not, I would have needed to run 3 miles that day for our training plan.

I really need to start giving myself more credit for the things that I do. I need to stop thinking that what I do isn't as important or impressive as someone else who is doing the same exact thing. I went out and I ran. Bottom line. Regardless of time, speed, distance. I did it.








Sunday, September 22, 2013

I Feel Like a Failure

I keep trying new things that last a day or two and then I give up. I'm either not strong enough, not patient enough, I don't have enough self control, etc. In all of these new things I realize that I am not enough.

This post is more of a ramble than any realization I could make. I have no profound thoughts. I also may be two glasses of wine in and am not quite sure what will come out of this.

I got rid of the scale almost two months ago. The first month went by and I felt great. I was learning how to appreciate my body the way that it is. I felt happy. Genuinely. The problem? I wasn't watching what I was eating. I fell into old habit with my eating, stopped going to the gym and expected things to change for the better.

I know this doesn't work, but isn't that the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

After hearing good reviews about Intuitive Eating and the The Body Image Workbook, I decided to buy them. I started with the workbook. I took the initial quizzes to see where I was starting at. I reverted back to the negative self talk. I started hating my body again.

At this time I had also done a little online shopping. I have decided that I wanted some more work appropriate outfits and ordered in a size 12, the size I have been wearing that has been fitting comfortably.

The orders have been arriving over the past couple days. They are all tight. Not horribly (well, not according to Patrick), but it's just not what I wanted or what I was hoping for.

I am so disappointed. In the clothes, in my body, in myself.

But no one can change it but myself.

So, once again.. I'm back at it. Starting tonight I plan on continuing to read Intuitive Eating. Starting tomorrow I plan to get back to working out, and more than just running. I also plan on having more self control in regards to my eating.

I can do this..

Maybe if I say it enough I will actually start to believe it.

Friday, September 20, 2013

Night Before Race Day

Tonight is the night before the Simi 5K.

This will be my first race in 6 months and 4 days.

I feel prepared. I feel ready. I feel excited. I feel nervous.

I don't want to say it's "only 3 miles" because I have been known to tell people to never put the word only in front of any amount of miles. Own it. Be proud.

It's three miles! Well, 3.1 to be exact.

That's not what's getting to me. It's not the distance. It's the atmosphere.

I both love and hate the crowds at race day. It causes anxiety which in turn pushes my adrenaline up and I am able to push myself further and faster during the race, most of the time.

I am trying to not let myself get worked up. I was used to this and need to get used to it again since I will be doing this at least once a month for quite some time. I am trying to shift my focus from extremely nervous to extremely excited.

You see, as I've mentioned, this will be the first 5K race for my best friend and the second 5K race for my niece. I am so excited to run with them and hopefully be there for some support along the way. They may not need it, but I'll be there to provide whatever I can. This race is for them.

I'm so happy to get back to racing. It helps me with training to have races set up. It's my main source of motivation when it comes to running. As much as it causes anxiety it causes happiness too and that's where my focus needs to be.

All I can do tonight is have a light dinner, set my clothes out for tomorrow and be ready to cross that finish line and collect my bling. No reason to worry or stress about it because there's nothing I can do at this point to change anything.

Plus, I've run much longer distances with much less preparation, something I do not recommend. This time I know I am more than ready.




Saturday, September 14, 2013

Running Recap

My first run of the week was on Tuesday. I contemplated going Monday, but decided that I wanted to spend time with my family so I went Tuesday after work at my parents house. I started out going my normal route, but then decided to cross the street so that I could have a slightly different course. I can't even tell you what a difference it made to just be one block over.

The plan was to turn at the normal street in order to get back on track and to continue running the 2.2 mile route. But I felt great and I wanted to keep going. So I did by turning left instead of right. This course would include a lot more hills, but what the heck. I love hills!

I was running along, doing my thing, clearly not paying as much attention as I should have. I ended up running right past a bee hive, which was located at the base of a light pole. So I was literally running through it. My watch beeped at me to walk, but I just kept running. When I finally felt like I had gone far enough I started walking, but I could still hear buzzing. I couldn't figure out where the bee was until I looked back and saw that the sleeve of my shirt was moving.

The bee had found it's way inside of my shirt...

One of my fitness/running goals is to eventually be confident enough with my body that I would be able to run on a hot day in just a sports bra and running shorts/pants.

I may not have been confident, but I don't believe I have ever taken my shirt off as fast as I did. I shook my shirt out and the bee flew away. I lucked out that 1. I wasn't stung and 2. That only one car had the unfortunate experience of seeing me in my sports bra and running pants.

I continued on my run without any more excitement. I feel like it was a good run with a pretty good average pace.

Distance: 4.23mi
Time: 52:33
Avg Pace: 12:25
Elevation Gain: 307ft
Mile 1- 11:57
Mile 2- 12:16
Mile 3- 12:42
Mile 4- 12:27
Mile 0.23- 7:53
Temperature: 72*, 73% humidity

I decided to run again on Wednesday. We were going to go to dinner with the family for our weekly trivia night. The restaurant is probably less than a mile away if I take the shortest path. I decided, however to go the long way around and make it worth my time.

It was definitely a good use of my time and I'm really glad I decided to run there.

Distance: 2.56mi
Time: 30:31
Avg Pace: 11:54
Elevation Gain: 264ft
Mile 1- 11:48
Mile 2- 11:41
Mile 0.56- 7:02
Temperature: 73*, 73% humidity

Patrick and I had plans Friday afternoon so I decided to take the whole day off of work. This gave Patrick and I a chance to take Isabel to school together. Since Patrick's schedule didn't really work to my advantage to run this weekend I decided I would run after dropping Isabel off at school. The first two miles were a little rough with some shin/calf pain as well as a little ache in my knee. It went away though and I feel like I did well in staying strong and slowing down. I'm still not quite where I want to be speed wise on my long distance runs, but I'm learning to listen to my body and let the time figure itself out.

I have a mile time in mind that I would prefer to stay under so anything under that is fine by me, especially since I'm going to need to hold that time for 13-26 miles while in a race.

Distance: 5.17mi
Time: 1:06:04
Avg Pace: 12:47
Elevation Gain: 136ft
Mile 1- 12:31
Mile 2- 12:54
Mile 3- 13:14
Mile 4- 12:41
Mile 5- 12:28
Mile 0.17- 2:14
Temperature: n/a

As soon as I got home from my run Friday morning I really wanted to go out and run again. My next opportunity was Saturday morning, but I wasn't sure what time we would be home from the concert. We ended up getting home after midnight and I didn't fall asleep until close to 1am, however I had already made plans to wake up at 630am and head out for my run.

The course was from my apartment to my niece's soccer game. I mapped it out on map my run and it totaled just over 5 miles. I figured it would be a good distance to run again and since it was my first time running that distance two days in a row it would give me a small idea as to what training for Dopey would be like (on a much smaller scale).

I woke up early and headed out. The course was simple. All I had to do was stay on the wash the entire time and when it ends I would be about a block away from the soccer fields. Unfortunately, and I have no idea how this happened, I ended up going the wrong way. I would love to walk the course again in a few days to see where I should have gone because I've done this run before and I have zero idea as to what happened. Anyways, the run ended up being 6.65 miles due to this little detour.

I felt great. The first mile or two was a little rough starting out. I felt stiff and obviously pretty tired, but I did it and I feel great that I did.

It's weird thinking that I'll be adding another 20 miles on top of that 6 mile run. I often think about that when I'm running and I really need to be kinder to myself. I have to realize that taking two months off means that I am starting over completely. My fitness level is not the same and I have to reteach my body how to run for this amount of time and for these distances. It doesn't take away what I've already done and it doesn't mean that I won't be able to do it again. All that it means is that I have to take training seriously in order to make it.

Distance: 6.65mi
Time: 1:25:04
Avg Pace: 12:48
Elevation Gain: 300ft
Mile 1- 12:43
Mile 2- 13:06
Mile 3- 13:12
Mile 4- 12:44
Mile 5- 12:45
Mile 6- 12:13
Mile 0.65- 8:17
Temperature: 64*, 94% humidity

Friday, September 13, 2013

September 12, 2013

7am: 2 eggo protein waffles, 1 Tbsp Nutella
815am: 1 cup coffee, 3 tbsp coffeemate peppermint mocha creamer, 3 splenda
1030am: string cheese, apple
11am: banana, low calorie gatorade
1230pm: rice, peas, corn, hot & spicy spam
2pm: Drumstick
340pm: Granola bars
530pm: steak, mashed potatoes, bell pepper, cheesy breadstick, glass of wine

cardio activity: 1.34 mile walk, 2.05 mile walk
strength training:
70 squats

I took Isabel to school this morning. We always hold hands on our way from the car all the way into school. Today was different though. 

Today she saw two of her friends from the gate and immediately let go of my hand. Almost as if she were embarrassed to be seen with me.

I'm not ready for that yet! She's only 5. This isn't supposed to happen yet.. She's too grown up and it kind of makes me sad that her childhood is slipping away. Maybe it's time to start thinking about having another one.. 

Who am I kidding?! It's all I think about. But it's not quite time yet. Soon though.